Embrace Your Inner Bitch

The word “bitch” has gotten such a bad rap. I can flip the bitch switch better than anyone. I may seem like a quiet mouse, but you piss me off all the things I’ve been thinking about you come flying out. It’s no surprise that I’m a judgmental person. I’m most critical on myself so whatever fire under your ass you think you’re getting, it’s about 50 degrees warmer under mine. However, I have opinions about everything and everyone. I can probably name 5 negative things about you before I name positive. 

This isn’t a good thing and I’m in no way advocating anyone to be a judgmental prick of a person. However, sometimes being a bitch is warranted. Sometimes being a bitch just means to be assertive and get your points across. Sometimes it means drop kicking someone’s inflated ego for their own good.  Sometimes it means a swift jab of wit to let someone know that you’re not going to take the shit they seem to think they can shovel your way. Sometimes you’ve been taking someones little digs for so long, that finally you just snap like a twig and go from zero to uber bitch in 60 seconds or less. 

It’s okay. I promise you that no one is a church mouse 24 hours a day everyday. So embrace it. The words “I’m Sorry” were invented for a reason. There’s a time and a place for everything so don’t let your bitch flag fly all day, but definitely by all means give it some airtime. You have a voice. You have opinions. You can be validated. Besides, there are so many people who just need a good dose of reality in a not so subtle way. 

Bitch Switch is on. Embrace! 

Gratitude and Fun

This weekend was full of things I’m grateful for and just fun. Sometimes when things have been so heavy for so long, it definitely helps to have a day that is light and airy. My husband and I decided to take the dogs to the dog park and then for a walk along the Hermosa Beach Strand. It was good exercise and good company. I couldn’t have asked for more. I’ve been working on trying to move more and get out more so this was the perfect way to do it. 

I was even able to get some great pictures of us with Nico. Gatsby is a little tougher to photograph because he is a squirmer. 

I’m beyond grateful for sunshine, my husband, my dogs, and exercise. 

How did you spend your weekend? What are some things you’re grateful for? What do you do for fun?

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Inhabit Your Body

Let’s face it, we’re all just a bunch of talking heads. From our neck down, we are barely  aware that we have fully functioning vessels that take us through our days. Yes, we are aware that we have fingers to type away and limbs to carry us to our cars, but we hardly notice that our bodies house our souls. ( this might be a little too much for some of you, so just exit out now)

As I went on my walk today, I kept thinking about how I have been so disconnected from my body. My brain that houses all my thoughts have led me through my days. I’ve treated the rest of me like a crippled animal that is dragging their lower torso behind them.So my mission for today was to stay present and inhabit my body.

Try it. Let me know what you discover. Do you have more strength than you thought? Do certain thoughts create certain responses? Do you respect your body more when you realize just how powerful it can be?

Buckle Up.

I often get little bits of quotes and articles in my Google + Feed and I find them useful. Actually, I’m the type of person that absorbs everything I read because I believe that everyone and everything has something to offer you. One of these articles was talking about what values in a person make for the best relationships. Having gone through a particularly rocky spring and summer, I felt that I could definitely benefit from reading what others felt were values that should be the foundation of a relationship. 

Very clearly they were trust, loyalty, and honesty. As I began to examine these values, I could definitely see how they would be part of a relationship. After all, if there is no honesty or trust, then really what is there? I believe that we are constantly tested by those that we love blindly. These are the people that when it comes to light that they don’t always have our best interest at heart or that they might just feel differently that it hurts the most. These are the people that quite harshly drive in the stake into our hearts because we never even saw it raised in the first place. 

A relationship is a bumpy ride. It’s not a merry-go-round but rather a rollercoaster. You better buckle up tightly and be ready for the slow rises and the quick dips. Like a rollercoaster, a relationship can take your breath away. ( both in that exhilarating way and in the way that feels like you’re dying) You can spend your whole life preparing for the joyride or you can just take the plunge. It might be an enjoyable ride or it might be a terrifying one. Most likely, it will be both. 

It’s Not My Job…

Normally I would snarl at someone’s inability to step up and take responsibility even it’s not technically in their job description, but I read something today that gave me a completely different outlook. I’ve written about being a people pleaser before and about worrying so much what others think. The simplest advice came to me in the form of a column in a magazine when I was at the library today. The advice was that it is not our job as human beings to make others think, feel, or do anything. It’s our job to maximize our own happiness,kindness, and health. We are only responsible for ourselves, nothing more and nothing less. 

I breathed a huge sigh of relief when I read this because I often take on so much responsibility that isn’t mine. If someone doesn’t feel the same way about me as I feel about them, I try to make myself something more to attract their attention. If I want to share my honest opinion about something, I often hold back because of what the other person will think. If I find someone too dysfunctional to be around, I give them the benefit of the doubt time and time again. Why? Misplaced responsibilities. It’s not my job to protect anyone else, JUST ME.

Why am I caring so much about other peoples’ feelings and not enough about my own? I should be able to be honest in all my endeavors and if someone can’t accept that truth, it should be their problem to reconcile it and not mine. If someone is feeling insecure about something, it’s not my job to lie and say that it’s okay when it’s not. It’s not my job to premeditate every thought so that I make sure that my tone is not too aggressive or biting. It’s not my job to become less so they can be more. It’s not my job. I can stop working so damn hard. Hallelujah! 

So if I can give any advice for today, it would be the same advice that was offered to me today. Only do the work that is required of you. Your health, happiness, and kindness at its maximum. Everyone else can do their share.